I was at a house party hosted by my friend here in Perth. It was a potluck party and I have to mention that everyone survived my cooking! We had an excellent dinner and some even more delicious desserts. Then being a connoisseur of wines, he laid out a platter of different kinds of wines and cheese which most of them tasted and appreciated well within decency limits.
Imagine a situation where in a random person at a party goes overboard with the alcohol served to them at the host’s place. I have seen it happen umpteen number of times in parties back home in India. But what surprised me most was that it happened here and sadly the person happens to be from my motherland. There arose a situation where this guy went so drunk that he actually ended up verbally offending the host who had so kindly invited him to his house and who played the role of the host to perfection.
With my limited experience with parties involving alcohol and me being an almost novice when it comes to the subject, I was particularly taken aback at this kind of atrocious behaviour. Even as a child, I was brought up in a way where in, if we were invited to a dinner or a lunch, we had to maintain a decorum which caused the most minimal of inconveniences to the host of the party in their house. I was always expected to lend a hand at any household chores or organisation problems. It has been my duty many a times where I have played the role of the food and beverage manager at our friend’s place during a celebration or event.
Another important lesson I was made sure that I learn to perfection was that if we were invited to a third place like a restaurant and if we had the liberty to order according to our wishes, I would have to pick an item on the menu that would be on the lower spectrum of the price list and that which would cause no monetary burden on the person paying the bill.
The incident that I witnessed a few days back has reiterated my preconceived notion that our country men tend to cross the line when there is free alcohol served. I cannot reason out this kind of behaviour and I am not able to judge whether it happens in other cultures and societies as well. I have being witness to such incidents at home and abroad which had multicultural groups in their invitee lists. Every time I have seen one, it has involved an Indian, which I very painfully have to accept at this point in time.
It boils down in my opinion to the atmosphere in which one has been brought up. It is a perfect reflection of the values and culture of public decorum that has been imbibed in a person as child and adolescent. Some of them perceive that if it is something that you don’t have to pay for, try and misuse it to the highest degree and make the person offering it miserable and kick himself in the room after the party for the mistake he made in inviting the wrong person. What saddens me most is that people in other countries now categorise our men or women as junket seekers and it is a reputation that sticks for life.
I am extremely lucky to have been brought up by fantastic parents who have put some of these important and life saving cultures into my genome. I value those upbringing skills to no end when I am exposed to a western society and culture. It has helped me behave in an acceptable and appreciable manner and being accepted in a culture and society that was alien to me. Looking back at it, it is not rocket science that one needs to know these behavioural skills, but as the saying goes, common sense is not common among all people.
I only hope that I am not witness to incidents like these in the future, where it not only puts the person to shame and ridicule, but the our whole country’s image at black and shatters.
